Valentine's Day during Lent?

I was chatting with a dear friend last night about Valentine's Day. She mentioned taking down her decorations and it made me think: Is it sinful to experience love and joy on Valentine's Day since it is the 2nd day of Lent? Is it? Some of you may be nodding yes right now, but I gave it alot of thought. The first thing that came to mind was the story my mom told me of how she never got to celebrate her birthday when it fell during Lent. Can you imagine not celebrating your child's life? It is something the kids look forward to for months! Guess what? So is Valentine's Day. As a child, there were stars in my eyes as I looked at the different boxes of Valentine's cards at Mott's. I got excited about giving my teachers a special treat. I couldn't wait to get home and neatly write each of my classmates' names on the envelopes. I'd start thinking about the party we would have at school. All to celebrate love! I still remember some of the Valentine's Day crafts we made....even in Kindergarten! Those memories bring warmth and love to my heart even to this day.

Now that I am a mom, I want my kids to feel that same joy. The joy of GIVING something to others. Is it a far stretch to say that this is the same giving in almsgiving? The children are not just focused on what they will receive, but when they are, it is totally appropriate, they are kids! Which brings me to my next thought:

The church says, "No meat can be eaten on Ash Wednesday and all of the Fridays during Lent. This applies to all Catholics 14 and older," and "Only one full meal is permitted on Ash Wednesday and Good Friday for Catholics between 18 and 59. Two smaller meals are permitted, but the small meals should not equal a second full meal. Drinking coffee, tea and water between meals is allowed. Snacks between meals are not allowed."

You can decide for your own family at what age you think children should 'fully participate.' I do not want my kids to look at Lent as something that squashed out Valentine's Day or birthday parties. They are too young to process what we process.

As a child who was raised by a Catholic mother and Baha'i father, Lent only meant getting a little cardboard money box for the table, giving something up, and no meat on Fridays. As an adult, my knowledge of Catholic traditions has grown by leaps and bounds. I now know and follow the church's teachings. We will squeeze in extra prayer, extra rosaries, extra adoration, and hopefully daily mass. We will give to the poor. We will attend Stations of the Cross as well as go over them at home. We will make sacrifices. We will fast. We will go to Mass. We will make Lent "intentional" (as described by my friend, Lauren, here in her article posted by Austin Catholic New Media).

My children are already way ahead of where I was as a child. Lent is 40 days plus 7 Sundays. I do not think that celebrating Saint Valentine's Day just one of those days will teach my kids that Lent is not a time for prayer, fasting, and almsgiving. We are models, they see what we do and when they are adults, they will follow in our footsteps.

God bless you and your family this Lent.

UPDATED: This was just in my email. It was posted on Holy Heroes:
A priest friend sent us an email about Lenten penitential practices. He said it so well, I thought I should give it to you all to read.
"The Lenten penitential practices of prayer, fasting and almsgiving are not intended as a covert season of self-improvement, or worse, a time of self-bashing because we are sinners (even though we are), but are instead intended to help create an ever-larger space within our hearts to love. The practices are focused on dying to self so that we are expanded in our capacity to love. We seek deeper conversion and deeper love. By denying ourselves some good, we die to ourselves a little, so that we can grow more in love of God and neighbor. We die to self to grow in love."

In-som-nee-uhhhhhhhhh

For about the last 20 months I've had horrible insomnia. I can fall asleep just fine, I just don't stay asleep. I wake up and crazy thoughts start racing through my mind. Thoughts of what I have to do the next day and the next. Things like: I need to get the chicken out to thaw and make sure Lauren put her homework back in her folder. Thoughts of errands that needed to be run, things to add to my grocery list, and and upcoming meetings would spin around in my head over and over. Part of that 20 months I was pregnant. Pregnant women are supposed to be exhausted, right? I thought I was waking up because I had to go to the bathroom so much. A dear friend suggested that I try Tylenol PM. It is safe during pregnancy and had helped her sleep during her pregnancies. So I tried it. That was a year ago. It may have helped me stay asleep a little longer, but I still woke up only to find I couldn't go back to sleep. About a month later I lost the baby. As all women do after a miscarriage, I tried to find a reason. I tried to blame myself for taking the Tylenol PM, even after a physician friend told me that wasn't the reason. We women are so hard on ourselves. A few weeks after that, a neighbor's dog started waking me up around 3:45 every morning. FOR A WHOLE MONTH. I think I know every Brazos County dispatcher's name now because I called every single night and sometimes twice a night. But that's another post.

So let me tell you I have tried EV-RY-THING! Zquil, Benadryl, Nyquil, Melatonin. We've flipped the mattress, we've bought new pillows. I slept with earplugs. I sprayed lavender spray in my pillow and darn near suffocated myself trying to inhale very deeply.

During the hundreds of hours that I would lie awake, I tried praying. I prayed for everybody and everything. I prayed thousands of Our Fathers and Hail Marys. I sang songs from church. NOTHING worked. I would stay in bed in hopes that sleep would eventually come. Dr. Oz had a show about insomnia in which his guest doctor and sleep expert said Melatonin really isn't recommended. Many people take it incorrectly and if you take too much, you can have awful nightmares. He said tart cherry juice has melatonin in it and it is good right before bed. I bought some and didn't notice a difference. I thought about how tryptophan makes everyone sleepy on Thanksgiving so I researched that. It isn't really the tryptophan that helps sleep, but the overeating itself. Bummer!

After Christmas we went to visit my aunt, uncle, and cousins. The first night we stayed in a hotel. Yeah, hotel beds aren't always the most comfortable. I slept 6 hours straight. Do you hear the choir of angels singing? I sure did. I was a whole new woman. The next 2 nights we slept at my aunt's house. I woke up a few times, but went right back to sleep. I'm not saying it was like the good ol' days of almost 8 hours of sleep, but it was huge progress! The 4th night we stayed with friends and slept on their hide-a-bed. Not the most comfortable, but not something to complain about. Again, I slept for long periods of time and when I did get up to go to the bathroom, I was able to get back to sleep.

I was so excited about an end to my insomnia. Then we went home.... and it came back. My patience meter no longer reset itself each night and every little bit of bickering or tattling put me over the edge. I was close to the point where I could understand how Marie Osmond walked away from her family. Stephen sensed my stress and sent me to adoration while he put the kids to bed. I was there 2 hours and it seemed like I could have stayed another 2 hours.

I posted about my insomnia on Facebook and my beloved high school youth minister said maybe a trip to a therapist would help. I tried not to be offended. I am a happy housewife. All I've ever wanted is to stay home and care for my family. How could I need a therapist? At the exact same time I was instant messaging with him, my friend Suzanne, mother of 5, made it very clear: although we are very happy in our vocation as mothers, being away from home meant I didn't have to worry about getting the kids ready for school. OR laundry. Or cooking. Or shuttling the kids to dance, etc... Being with family and friends meant I had help and other people the kids could play with and talk to and it wasn't all about Mommy so I could really, trully relax. Yep, makes perfect sense. My brain just wasn't shutting all the way down. So I looked ahead at an upcoming retreat with hope for another weekend of sleep. I put a fan on my side of the bed and when I woke up at 4, I started humming with the fan. Strange, I know. On our retreat we actually stayed up late and got up earlier than I do at home so I don't think that altered my insomnia at all.

When I returned home, it started getting worse. Monday and Tuesday mornings the exhaustion triggered my emotion hormones again and as Stephen was leaving for work, I started crying. During our Women's Endow Study on Suffering meeting on Tuesday, I held back the tears the best that I could, constantly dabbing my eyes with a napkin. Afterwards a friend, Carrie, asked me if I was okay and when I told her about my insomnia, she told me she has it, too, but not every day. She suggested having a little bit of wine and then some Benadryl. So I did and I slept 5 1/2 hours straight. I still woke up early, but just having 5 1/2 hours of uninterrupted sleep made a huge difference and gave me hope. Another friend, Heidi, emailed to see if I was okay. When I told her about my lack of sleep, she shared her blog post from 3 years ago about her insomnia. Finally I have found some friends who 'get it'. She said that prolonged lack of sleep is due to continued release of adrenaline, which protects your body in its vulnerable state. Makes perfect sense.

Yesterday was my birthday. The day started off with a few friends coming over for our monthly Mom's Prayer Group. It was a nice break from the same ol' same ol'. Last night Stephen and I splurged and ordered Sangia Swirls for dinner. Stephen and the kids got me lavender body wash, bubble bath, and pillow spray. When we got home, I had a long bath and took 2 Benadryl. I know, I know, never mix alcohol with medicine. I'm desperate here! After my bath my best friend called and then I went to bed. It was a good change up from my normal bedtime routine. No TV and no computer. I slept from 11:30 until Stephen's alarm woke us both up at 5. I figured I'd end up lying awake until we normally get up at 6:30, but I was wrong. I went back to sleep!!!! Ahhhh! Chime in the harps and trumpets here! It was such a breakthrough. I pray that I get the same amount of sleep tonight.

Holy Fire

Holy Fire burn away
My desire for anything
That is not of You
And is of me
I want more of You
And less of me

That was our theme song at our ACTS retreat this past weekend. The actual theme was 'I must decrease, He must increase' John 3:30. It was an amazing retreat that changed me forever. 37 women met at our church Thursday night and received a spirit-filled send-off from our family as well as others who have been on ACTS retreats before. I became more and more excited as I watched other retreatants check in because only two of my friends told me they were going. It turned out that about 9 of my former co-workers were on the trereat and overall I knew about 20 of the 36 women.

We squeezed into vans like sardines and visited for the hour and forty minute drive. We were greeted at the doors of the van by what seemed like a very loud group of singers and guitarists. We were escorted to the dining hall where we were nourished physically and spiritually.

I was lucky to be paired up with Kimberly as my roomate, as I've never had time to really get to know her. We I fell asleep in conversation Saturday night, it was like being a teenager or college student again. I would like to tell you I got more sleep than I've gotten in a long time (because of my insomnia), but I really can't. We were always woken up before sunrise.

I can not mention any details because we all agreed that would be taking away from future retreatants' "aha" moments. I can say there was a lot of singing, praying, listening, sharing, cleansing, and bonding. Father Edwin spent the entire weekend with us and I learned so many things about this man. We are so very blessed to have him at our parish. He has experienced much, including visiting with Blessed Mother Teresa! Wow! He was a good sport. I mean to spend an entire weekend with 60 women!

The facilites were beautiful. There was a large pond with the tallest pine trees behind it and a path all around it. In addition to the spacious dining hall, there was a chapel, the lodge where we stayed which included a meeting area and 23 bedrooms, a pool, a covered picnic area, and then some cabins that were nestled in the woods. One of the cabins was oversized and used as another meeting area. It would have been a great place for a family reunion.

Sunday morning we had a quick breakfast and boarded the vans for our journey back to reality. We all celebrated Mass together for one last time. That included the 22 retreat leaders from San Antonio! And some of their families! At the end of Mass, we stood at the steps of the altar and sang our theme song. It was our last spirit-filled moment together. We had a luncheon together, took pictures, exchanged hugs, and promised to keep in touch. What a sad time to say goodbye to my 59 new Sisters In Christ.

I returned home with a fresh perspective on my family and my home. I am more forgiving and patient. I make more time to talk to God. I have vowed to keep the fire going.  It is our (retreatants) turn to plan the next retreat and we hope to have it in the fall. I hope more of my friends will be on that one with me, it will change their lives forever.

And for my ACTS Sisters In Christ, "HONK!"

Eureka! A housecleaning dream come true!

I don't know about you, but I'm a happy pinner. I have my very important daily routine of checking Facebook and Pinterest and just pin, pin, pinning along. Among my thousands of pins I have found some interesting cleaning concoctions. Today I went out and bought a dish scrubber where you can put the soap in the handle. I filled it halfway with vinegar and halfway with Dawn (store brand). Then, at 8:00 tonight, I went to town on my built-up shower door and bathtubs. I also poured half a cup of vinegar into the toilets and waited to be disappointed. See, we have this pinkish build up in our toilets that I just couldn't get rid of. I suppose it's because of the minerals in our water, I've never had pink stains before, but no matter what products I had tried in the past, nothing worked.

I immediately fell in love with the scrubber and now have a sparkling shower door and bathtub. Don't worry yourselves about me cleaning on a Friday night, I left the rest of the Master bathroom for tomorrow. And guess what happened when I scrubbed the toilets? Yep, that pink came right off. I did have to let the vinegar soak again and then scrub again, but that's probably because that crusty stuff had been there a long, long time. Just in time for my professional organizer and housecleaning friend of mine to visit- I have sparkly, shiny toilets. I was so surprised that I had to go back and look deep under the rim two more times. So, all you need is a little vinegar! Who knew?

All Saints Day

When I was a child, we didn't do much to celebrate All Saints Day. I went to Catholic school for 3 years and I don't remember doing anything special at all. Now-a-days most churches have a celebration after Mass where the kids are encouraged to dress up as a saint, angel, or other religious life. Last year was our first year to participate. The kids had a blast and we all learned more about the holy people who have gone before us.

2012-St. Kateri, Mary, St. Francis, and St. Joseph

2011

.


In addition to finding great costume ideas on the internet, I have been finding lots of games and activities. While it would be fun and educational to do them all, it wouldn't be feasable. My goal is to try one or two new things each year and soon they will become family traditions. Simple decorations might include gathering any books about saints, saint statues or prayer cards and arranging them on your table. If you have any special candles, don't forget to include those as well. It doesn't take much to make a lasting impression with the kids.

Here are some ideas:
*Color saint pictures and turn them into stick puppets.
*Put the stick puppets in the ground and play ring toss.
*Color saint pictures and make a penant banner.
*Make saint paper sack puppets from Catholic Icing. This link will also take you to great food ideas and more.
*Print and cut out little pictures of saints and place them in the Guess Who game found on Equipping Catholic Families blog.
*Play Saints scavenger hunt found on Shower of Roses' blog.
*Search for the Saints scavenger hunt also found Waltzing Matilda.
*All Saints Bingo also from Shower of Roses.
*Make cut-out cookies with gingerbread man cookie cutters (male and female) and decorate like saint. You could also use cookie cutter symbols that represent saints such as a chalice, shield, or a bird for St. Francis of Assisi.

We also plan on reading some children's books about saints and playing a Litany of Saints from You Tube. Here is a beautiful idea for preparing your own family litany from a friend of mine.

My Fall Baking Bucket List

I LOVE Fall. Are you as excited as I am that it's finally here?

I love all things Fall:  the smell of the air, festivals, pumpkins, football, open windows, chili, soup, candles burning, Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Advent. I love homemade Chex mix (we don't call it trash), decorating, cooking in the oven, and most especially baking.

Here in Aggieland we don't use the oven much from April through at least October, it's just too hot. But cooler weather is coming, I feel it and I'm ready with my bucket list of goodies I'm going to bake for my family.


Pumpkin White Chocolate Drops
Butterscotch Blondie Pie
My Mom's Apple Pie
Pumpkin Pie Crunch
Caramel Corn
Pumpkin Bread


And my other Fall favorites:
Spicy Chex Mix- we make at least 8 of these double batches each year.
Chicken Pot Pie
Chili
Quiche
Soups

Here are some apple recipes.
and here are some Halloween recipes.

What are your favorites?

Myths About Being a Stay at Home Mom

My whole life I knew I wanted to be a stay at home mom (you know, like June Cleaver with a tidy home, something baking in the oven, and always a smile on my face). I was extremely disappointed when that didn't happen right after my first was born. Or second. Or third. Or even 4th. It did happen though. Three years ago when the youngest was a year old I went to half-time, teaching 7:30 am until 11:30 am, and last year I got to walk away from the most wonderful job I ever had and walk into the most wonderful thing I will ever DO.

Now don't get me wrong, it wasn't at all what I pictured. I mean, I knew I would have much more time to get my house in order, but somehow, at the end of each day I felt like I had failed miserably at keeping my home neat and clean. There were dishes that needed to be put away, toys I didn't have the energy to put away, and laundry that needed to be dealt with.  I struggled daily with trying to stick to my plan. I still do, but it has finally sunk in that spending quality time with the kids at home is much more important than making beds.

So now I am being pulled away from my post by my 2 year old who is eager for me to play with him and I will go....

This morning after feeding all the kids, getting them dressed, 2 kids to school, and while picking up and putting away over 100 items like marbles that rolled away, Barbie shoes, Legos, books, and so on, it dawned on me that this journey parallels my own spiritual journey. While I am not at the beginning of my journey, I am not at the end either. Some days I get further ahead and some days I get a little behind, but as long as I keep my eyes on the end result, pleasing God on both journeys, I am doing alright.

As my best friend of 35 years reminds me regularly when I rush around to clean the house for guests, "Are they coming to see you or your house?" I try to remind myself that my kids won't remember how toys were everywhere all the time, they will remember how much I played with them. So put that to-do list on the desk and go play with your kids!

Cloud Dough #179

 Okay, this container was clearly not big enough.

Cloud dough is so soft and it smells good, too. All you need is:

8 c flour
1 c baby oil

It looks really disgusting until you get it all mixed in.
I let the kids use cups, cookie cutters, and sand toys. They had a good time with this texture.

#204 Make Your Own Slime

 This slime was so easy to make!

All you need is 1 1/2 c liquid starch (not found at H-E-B) but I have plenty to share with my local friends.
1 1/2 c clear glue
food coloring
glass bowls
paper towels

I made the mistake of not measuring the clear glue. I assumed 2 bottles equaled 1 1/2 c based on the blog where I found this. I added the liquid starch and it was not all absorbed by the glue. It didn't matter too much, I just mixed and mixed and then poured the excess starch out.

 Just mix the glue and starch and stir.

 Separate the gooey blob into several bowls and add a few drops of food coloring.

 No, my toddler does not always run around the house in a diaper. I didn't want him to spill on his jammies.

 Next, let the kids mash and mush away.

 It was pretty cool how the slime took the shape of the bowls.

 I let the kids mix the colors.

This really was a fun experiment that kept the kids engaged for quite awhile. My oldest put hers in a baggie. We will see how it is in the morning.

Don't foget to check out the rest of my summer bucket list for over 200 fun things to do with kids.

#97 and #122 Liquid/Spray Sidewalk Chalk

 The kids LOVED this. They quickly sprayed all their bottles empty and begged me to make more. That being said, I'll make way more than the original recipe next time. They eventaully sprayed the fence and their wooden swing set.

1 c cornstarch PER BOTTLE
1 c water PER BOTTLE
1-2 drops food coloring PER BOTTLE
spray bottles (buy from Dollar Tree or H-E-B for .99)

There are 2 ways you can mix this up. You can pour one c water in each bottle and use a funnel to pour the cornstarch in, or you can mix it all up in a large measuring cup and pour it in.
Shake and spray!

For over 200 more ideas of fun stuff to do with your kids, check out my summer bucket list.

Make Your Own Puffy Paint

cardboard
food coloring
Dixie Cups or other small containers
1 T self-rising flour
1 T salt
1 T water
1 drop food coloring
Cotton Swabs

1. Place 1 T flour in each cup.

2. Add 1 T salt.

3. Add 1 T water.



4. Add 1 drop of food coloring.



5. Stir.

You may want to make a white one as well.

6. Design your masterpiece. Then microwave for about 30 seconds.

The final product. You can't tell from the picture, but the paint really did puff up.

#203 Coffee Filter Art

 I first saw this idea on the blog "Mommy With Selective Memory." Hers are beautiful! I knew this would be great for my kids...only the paint in my dabbers was too thick. I can't tell you how disappointed I was.

 I did the rainbow one myself and the kids were doing the other ones. I stopped them and got out the food coloring.

 I don't really recommend this because the kids had to hold the coloring down on the filter for it to go through. My kids are small so sometimes there would be a mess on the table.

But they did turn out pretty. I still like the effect on the original blog.

For over 200 more fun ideas to do with kids, click on "Summer Bucket List" at the top of the page, under my blog title.

#205 Glue Painting

 Every year when school supplies go on sale I stock up. I had 8 bottles in my organizer that had been used so I levelled them off and added food coloring to make our glue paint. Each bottle was about 2/3 full and I added 5 drops of food coloring. That may have been too much, you could try 3 or 4. Then I shook...and I shook...and I shook.

 It's a good thing I didn't have more glue because I would have gotten into blending colors and there's just not enough room in our house for excess.

 I really thought that doing this on black paper would make the colors pop. It did, but when it dried, most of it was absorbed by the black...so use don't use black.My kids really love America's Got Talent, that's what Lauren made top, right.

If you make designs on wax paper, they become window clings. Just let them dry and peel them off carefully. To make them stick to the window, rub a little water on the back. Spencer (2) is learning to identify the letters in his name so I did this one as an example.

#174 Bead Suncatchers

All you need is some beads and small pans. I picked up the beads at Hobby Lobby with my 40% off coupon. My pans came from our Easy Bake oven so they fit nicely into our toaster oven. Cook at 425 until melted. I cooked the first batch too long and boy did it stink up the house. I checked the 2nd batch after 5 minutes and they were just melted enough. You don't want them to start browning on the edges.

For over 200 more ideas of fun things to do with kids, click here.

New Sandbox

Stephen took a break from his schoolwork and some video work he needed to do to build this awesome sandbox. We first saw the idea on Pinterest, but it is a Home Depot plan. Since we have 4 kids, Stephen altered the plans to make it bigger. The base is roughly 7 1/2' x 8'. He made it to fit this corner of the yard by the house.

The materials cost $125, we used 20 bags of sand, at $3.50 each, in addition to the 4 or 5 from the old sandbox. The kids L-O-V-E it. Just by chance, the left 3/4 is in the shade in the morning and the right 3/4 are shaded in the evening. We had 3 friends over to play Friday night and it was just the right size.

And did I mention the seats fold and transform into a cover? AKA stage.